current fragments

I face the heavens but cannot breathe

So I turn to the right hand Path

where

Once, sand gathered at the head

Of the bed

from the shore a day before, where a

Dog comforted my boreal

Grief ( or

Of

Soil from

The garden of the dead)


I turn to the left hand path

Banks

Of thirst

from

rivers beneath , starving tangible dark growth  

lifeless crib

rigor mortis


Face down, I avoid the ecstasy of hogties 

devoid of blood pulsing 

My drowned avatar 

my criminal

my star flag of David 

films of final breathing


this shoulder then, still knows the damage of crosses carried 

that dangerous temper

the agitation of cancer, stricken 

the sounds of last stations and hours

  • to the centre then, the ancient 

mortier of dirtied light and static 

father of white noise

glaucoma gift for a 4K world


I

she bends her spine backwards

she in her glitter, sequined, crystal top 

a limbo rock 

wavering form

inverse cobra 

she, with her two white men in layered suits

bank vault  bodies

I chase them out of the house 

( my motherlode / motherland ) 

“get the fuck out !”

but without the energy of rage or malice 

  •      it’s an emptying of the house  – to remain in sacred unlit spaces, untouch the debris 

the cold electrical wires sticking out of plaster

maybe a ‘time from before’ exorcised 

the comfort of vacancy

  • (backtrack) 

like a corpse on a bus is he

sits he in flesh and skeletal frame

 too small for starched white shirt

 blackened oversized pants

I can almost smell his

skin of wax 

hair hardened formaldehyde 

pale as the horse from endtime 

I sense he’s an otogoya 

coming back to life

dropping snake scales from our eyes 

to chase away squatting spirits from the house

making space for landscapes

“washing out the womb” 

38

38

we moved through the vast hanger and found signs of the cities within

Subcultural artefacts, colour coded documents, symbols of prior cybernetworks, stacks of pointless currencies

there were elevators on street levels that led to underground corridors, glassed from the outer world like endangered creatures, cautiously handling plant medicine

36

36

disorientation of the son, septu in hades

I’m emptied out, a soul fatigued by a fog that suffocates
embedded in the terrain of troubled sleep
the seekers are falling apart at the seams
their pastel oracle cards failing them
mini metallic dice to seal false fates
women who adored energies are weeping
shrouded figures behind them, imposing the weight of weariness

I’m pushing along endless unlit corridors
the mall is shuttered and abandoned
life sucked out of her walls
unable to find the way home

unable to find mother and father

I am without compass here
cut off from the loom
frustrated, restless, desperate, departed
in a place that is not theirs but mine

a dead man says he knows me here
from the time of neonmancy
I’m robbed of knowledge
I ply a trade that does not pay

I cannot find father and mother

there are no boats on Acheron or Lethe
the Styx is a knotted mess inside me
no stairways upwards or doorways out
I’m a child left behind in this colourless world
leaving bridal chamber for burial grounds

mother gets up from her wheelchair
but I’m not there to hold her
father is silent
I’m on a lost floor, maps confounded
wounded with perpetual loss
memories, false
sanctuary, crumbling
no signs or voices to lead the way
only hounds, barking without end

34

34

they communicate with me from a place my body can’t go

activity, scenario, environ as language 

stripped of concrete signs but imbued with knowing

I heed the unseen but also grapple

80% trust 20% doubt 

the training ends, payout secure 

but there’s, I thinks price I pay, some 20%

33

33

an arc of varied images but one desert
within me (or as I am, with it, is)
illicit substances grown by the heat of a star
presented in forking paths

candelabras, tabernacles, chandeliers, gateways
suspended in sunlight, in gardens

I am a storehouse of motifs

battling hunger
soft mourning
familiar furniture but different in scale
subtle shifting positions
the blessing of young flesh

placing frequencies in the hand of others
cradling the open wounded, diseases in the hallway

an arc of varied deserts but one image

32nd path of septu

I pass through the gates
that landed here before my time
artificial bodies of water

chlorine, garden chairs, elliptical headdress

I follow the motherlode but cannot keep up
spiral stairways, glimpse of ankle, almost calf
into corners disappearing
led into mysteries of the mansion
turquoise, marine atmospheres, a prescience in hidden rooms

her dress has changed
as death clothes are buried in landfills
I’m a bout of circular signals
like the sign on her forehead beyond the veil

I am fissures, breath rising from catacombs
but this is my world and not hers
I am in the dim places still
unlike her, luminous
I am still a shadow treading smoke and mirrors
the scroll of the arc that falleth from blackwashed wall
cathedral gotha, end night shores
the scratching of the trees in spectral moonlight
piercing fantomas, ever iteras

31 ‘ for m’

the first wave descended from circe ceiling
as if crawling out of a sun in the middle of a constellation
limbs and taut bodies stretched in black
moving like spiders to its target

Is this intervention or incursion?
Infiltration / intercession?

your wave was waiting in the prep room, on the verge of activation
I looked at you outside its door

I remember us
both belonging to one Breath

I remember us
our spirits as mirrors
grey light in grey light

I remember us
before we lost each other
before our moment of contact
standing side by side
before a familiar monument

30

30

ashes from burning buildings

ashes from dried palm leaves 

ashes from cigarette light 

ashes behind marble slab

ashes on forehead

ashes in the heart 

ashes on the banquet table

ashes in money bins

ashes from love letters 

ashes from flowers 

ashes on the shore

ashes from the very first fire

ashes from the final hour 

ashes 

ashes 

a return to ashes

23

23

components of bread on a white plate
hospital eating table
armchairs alongside corridors, sick people in fetal positions
a mothers’ heart stops. she stops breathing.
she comes back. current status unknown.

Meat curled or layered on a plate
tables turn. men, foreign to each other.
tables as routes as illness as health. tables adjacent. table of the tabernacle. components of bread on a white plate.

21

kneeling
subservient
third world country

I know this dirty staircase
this filth filtered sunlight

I’m not on my knees
I’m bent low
suckling on the most black first
then the cream of a lighter shade
there’s the sickly yellow
and the whitest last

the serving is modest
but I’m bent low
finishing every drop
by soot and noise and street